did the journal factory explode??
7/14/26: Beginnings are special because most of them are fake. The new person you become with that first sip of wine was already there. Look at Pentheus twirling around in a dress, so pleased with his girl-guise he’s almost in tears. Are we to believe this desire is new? Why was he keeping that dress in the back of his closet anyway? Costume is flesh.
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7/28/26: having family dinners with not my family is making me realize i kinda miss my own..... which is strange because i don't even know if we have what i'm searching for, and it's only gonna get harder if my sister isn't at home, and my dad is for some reason always in washington dc??? like when was the last time we all sat at home together. when even was the last time we were all in the house at the same time??? if only this time of peace could've come at a time when everyone was still at home, but maybe (ironically) that time inherently couldn't have been peaceful because that's just what life was at that stage. hold on im gonna text nadia
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8/1/26: wanting to take up more space in your life but if your whole personality becomes me there won't be room left for the you i liked before anyway. how selfish can i be with this stuff ?? actually i think that's the whole point of that obsession movie lol
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8/8/26: just realized my mother has no trust in me which is why i struggle to trust myself. who woulda thunk. in other news pymetrics is the most evil thing i've ever had to do and these hr people keep inventing the worst ways to apply to jobs you could possibly come up with.
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9/8/26: feeling like i am very quietly drowning but i can't even make a fuss about it because everyone else is also keeping it nice and tidy and under wraps. there is constantly so much to worry about at any given moment.... and i hear im just supposed to Handle it all.......
in the wise words of bo burnham, the whole appeal of a burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained within the confines of the tortilla! and i wouldn't have gotten half this shit if i knew it wasn't gonna fit in the burrito!! but like. metaphorically speaking. yknow.
do you think i want a messy burrito?? no one wants a messy burrito.....
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9/14/26: thinkin about going skydiving ☝️
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